The Skull Decrees Interns #21 and #44 Joint Recipients of Intern of the Year!
It is rare that peons so distinguish themselves in the Skull’s service that they receive as much as a kind word, a crust of bread, or access to a light source outside of business hours. How much more impressive then that two such underlings should be awarded the Intern of the Year for thoroughly adequate service above-and-beyond the Skull’s expectations for such lowly worms. Congratulations, worms.
However, it is with the sincerest feigned regret that the Skull must bestow Intern of the Year posthumously upon Interns #21 and #44. An unfortunate and unforeseeable incident occurred in which the Skull’s magical defenses against ape invasion (many of you are familiar with just how bad apes can be at this time of year, especially those of the winged variety) interacted unpredictably with the donjon’s ensorcelled paper-shredder. Few sages could have even guessed that said shredder would react so strangely to interns carrying large stacks of rejected submission for Tales From the Magician’s Skull … but, even so, the rejected submissions did need to be shredded.
Both loyal interns did yeoman’s service during the magazine’s recent open call for submissions, and greatly assisted the other useful thralls likewise engaged: interns #17, #32, #44a, #56 (we are watching you, #56), and that wretched #143. But it is to #21 and #44 that we must doff our caps, valiant toilers both, one of whom’s true name most likely started with a ‘J,’ or perhaps even a ‘B’ (piddling details that shall no doubt be resolved by HR prior to the interns’ sanitary interment): we salute you, for there is no higher honor than to die in service to the Skull’s mission to blanket the Earth in the best of new sword-and-sorcery fiction.